Stopping Gun Violence In The U.S. Starts with Us - NVC Quick Connect June 2018

Stopping Gun Violence in the U.S. Starts With Us

NVC Quick Connect June 2018

Due to another school shooting, we want to focus this month's newsletter on gun violence. There are some concrete actions we can all take that are discussed in the articles below.

Please help. Please share.

What You'll Find in This Month's Newsletter:

Articles

Stopping Gun Violence In The U.S. Starts with Us
School Shootings Must STOP! The Answer is to Teach Compassion in Schools!
Broadening the Conversation: Gun Violence, Masculinity, and Being Vulnerable
How can we decrease the number of gun fatalities in the US?
How To Deal With Grief In A Healthy Way

Quotes by Marshall Rosenberg

OTHER GOOD STUFF

Non-Violence/No Guns (Pint-eresting)

VIDEOS

One of the Sante Fe victims was bullied and finally stood up for her self and her younger sister. She was killed...
Albany Addresses Bullying: Miki Kashtan: A Compassionate Perspective on Bullying
Landon McNamara - "Loss for Words" (Official Music Video)
- Repeat from last month's newsletter - it is very relevant and addresses the sadness of gun violence...

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June Book Specials

Our new and improved webstore has moved to here.

20% off retail before bulk discounts apply

Get an additional 10% for orders of $100 or more (= 30% off)

Get an additional 5% for orders of $150 or more (= 35% off)

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Featured Article

Stopping Gun Violence in the U.S. Starts With Us

By Psyched in San Francisco | Appeared in HuffPost

“Us vs. Them” is the poison this American culture is pumping out and ingesting on every level of our society and we are all ill from it. The longing to belong is wired into our cells, yet on multiple levels of our society we actively leave people out. By denying some citizens basic safety and care and actively persecuting others, we foster the cognitive openings for acting on impulsive violence. The easy access to guns makes this social sickness easy to act upon. Racism, discriminatory economics, unrepresentative politics, media violence and lack of empathy are the ingredients for this culture of violence that is now a national health epidemic.

....

Marshall Rosenberg, the creator of Nonviolent Communication, believes that violence starts with what he calls “moralizing judgments” about oneself or others. These are beliefs that people “should be” a certain way and that there are absolute rights and wrongs. This perpetuates the “us” vs. “them” mentality and is at the root of an economic, political and social system that keeps leaving people out. We protect our self-worth by dehumanizing people that are different from us.

Read More ...

"Peace requires something far more difficult than revenge or merely turning the other cheek; it requires empathizing with the fears and unmet needs that provide the impetus for people to attack each other. Being aware of those feelings and needs, people lose their desires to attack back because they see the human ignorance leading to those attacks. Instead, their goal becomes providing the empathic connection and education that will enable them to transcend their violence and engage in cooperative relationships."

~Dr. Marshall Rosenberg

Article #2

School Shootings Must STOP! The Answer is to Teach Compassion in Schools!

Genesis Young and Sulara James have created a petition to teach Non-Violent Communication in Schools which they believe will help stop violence and create a more peaceful society.

Over 2500 people are supporting this ground breaking petition. It is heartbreaking and gut wrenching to turn on the news and hear about yet another school shooting. It is unacceptable to have children killing each other in school or to have anyone resorting to gun violence in answer to their pain. There must be a change in the way people think and the way they approach each other. The creators of this petition believe that the answer is in educating youth in Non-Violent Communication from the earliest years through graduation from high school. They imagine that teaching compassion in the schools could completely change the community within a generation. If people first think of their own needs and the needs of others when conflict arises, there would be a common ground from which to solve problems. As Rumi said, there is a field beyond right and wrong, I’ll meet you there.

Marshall Rosenberg developed a system of Non-Violent Communication that can easily be taught to all ages. It is an effective system which gives children the tools they need to resolve conflict without resorting to violence. The creators of this petition believe that to have a more compassionate, non-violent community, this education must be made a part of the regular curriculum in all schools. People have a deep need to learn to connect, not pull out a gun to solve their problems.

Join the group of over 2500 people who have signed the petition to Teach Non-Violence in Schools on MoveOn.org since its creation in December of 2013. The goal is 100,000 signatures. The violence affects everyone. This is desperately needed now. Be a part of the solution by signing this petition now! http://petitions.moveon.org/sign/teach-nonviolence-in

Read More ...

Article #3

Broadening the Conversation: Gun Violence, Masculinity, and Being Vulnerable

[Please note: The views and opinions expressed in each post are those of the author and do not necessarily reflect the views and opinions of BayNVC as a whole.]

I was originally going to share with you a piece I’ve published here entitled the Skill of Love, about our beautiful capacity as humans to develop the qualities of care and good will. Given Valentines Day’s heart-rending school shooting, it would feel out of step to talk about love and not address the wider conversation about guns and violence—and masculinity.

So I write this post a day before it is published, just hours before leaving to teach a retreat. In these pages I share quite openly and personally. I am certain my thoughts might be more clear under different circumstances; please forgive any way in which they may be incomplete or unclear.

When there were no policy changes after the Sandy Hook murders, where 20 six- and seven-year olds and six adults were killed at the end of 2012, I felt angry, then worried, then numb. I thought, if elementary school students being mowed down can’t provoke sweeping changes, what will?

Today, I am heartened to hear the news of young people in Florida and beyond raising their voices to demand legislative change. I feel some hope when I read perspectives like this one from a Republican congress-member and vet taking a stand and supporting a ban on assault weapons. I am also happy to see faith leaders, political heads and media commentators discussing the relationship between school shootings and mental illness, a complex issue that is clearly part of the problem.

Read More ...

"I would like us to create peace at three levels and have each of us to know how to do it. First, within ourselves. That is to know how we can be peaceful with ourselves when we're less than perfect, for example. How we can learn from our limitations without blaming and punishing our self. If we can't do that, I'm not too optimistic how we're going to relate peacefully out in the world. Second, between people. Nonviolent Communication training shows people how to create peace within themselves and at the same time how to create connections with other people that allows compassionate giving to take place naturally. And third, in our social systems. To look out at the structures that we've created, the governmental structures and other structures, and to look at whether they support peaceful connections between us and if not, to transform those structures."

~Dr. Marshall Rosenberg

Article #4

How can we decrease the number of gun fatalities in the US?

When asked: How can we decrease the number of fun fatalities in the US?

A selection of your responses:

Ban all guns except hunting rifles; to get a hunting rifle, one should apply for a license to the police. Basically copy European laws. --JP

Ban assault rifles for all except military and police when on duty in a situation where such a weapon is appropriate and necessary. The framers of the 2d Amendment did not have assault rifles in mind.

Make the bullets cost $5000. each.....Chris Rock --David Seltzer

We need #LessGuns and Not Gun Control. It has been 20 years since Columbine and "Gun Control" has done NOTHING, in fact the number of "mass murders" and the number that are murdered has increased significantly. The 2nd Amendment says NOTHING about assault weapons/AR15's We need #LessGuns -- Fred Davenpor

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"Anger is a wake up call. It tells me that I’m thinking in a way almost guaranteed not to get my needs met. Why? Because my energy is not connected to my needs. I’m not even aware of what my needs are when I’m angry. What’s going on in my head is a big judgment about the other person. So, whatever I say is likely to mobilize defensiveness and counter attack. But, when I stop, become conscious of the judgment and then look beneath the judgment, what am I needing that I’m not getting? Then, there will be a transformation of feelings. As soon as I get in touch with the need I’m no longer angry. I’m sad, frustrated, irritated, discouraged and I have a need now that I want to get met. When I’m angry I want to blame and punish."

~Dr. Marshall Rosenberg

Article #5

How To Deal With Grief In A Healthy Way

by Danielle L'Ecuyer

Suffering a loss, no matter how traumatic it may be, can leave you facing an uphill struggle to climb. However, even with the deepest pain, there is hope. Grief is the body’s natural response to losing someone or something important to you. You may experience a variety of emotions, such as intense sadness, anger, and loneliness, and for different reasons. You can encounter grief for numerous reasons, such as the loss of a job, a relationship ending, moving to a new home, developing a chronic illness, or the loss of a pet or loved one. Everyone deals with grief differently, but by understanding your emotions, taking care of yourself, and seeking support when necessary, you will be able to heal and move on with your life. Learn more about the stages of grief and how to manage it in a healthy way.

Read More ...

"Violence comes from the belief that other people cause our pain and therefore deserve punishment."

~Marshall Rosenberg

Other Good Stuff

Non-Violence/ No Guns (Pint Interest)

Pint interest

"Criticism, analysis, and insults are tragic expressions of unmet needs."

~Marshall Rosenberg

VIDEOS

One of the Sante Fe victims was bullied and finally stood up for her self and her younger sister. She was killed. The shooter has said he was bullied by others.

Albany Addresses Bullying: Miki Kashtan: A Compassionate Perspective on Bullying

Albany Addresses Bullying: Miki Kashtan: A Compassionate Perspective on Bullying 3/5/2011

Video

We are repeating this video from last month – it is very relevant and addresses the sadness of gun violence and the loss of innocent life.

Mourning All of the Violence in the World Landon McNamara - "Loss for Words" (Official Music Video)

Landon McNamara - "Loss for Words" (Official Music Video) - Pray For The World - Pray for Vegas

Video

"Miracles can happen when we can keep our consciousness away from analyzing and classifying one another."

~Marshall Rosenberg

Marshall Wisdom With Illustrations

Conceived by Meiji Stewart - Illustrator David Blasidell

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20% off retail before bulk discounts apply
Get an additional 10% for orders of $100 or more (= 30% off)
Get an additional 5% for orders of $150 or more (= 35% off)

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PuddleDancer Press

www.nonviolentcommunication.com